Sunday, July 26

don't we all want to be perfect?
sometimes or maybe many,
i think about all my imperfections.
how i wish i wouldnt need to care
but i just do
subconsciously.
---
i had a good time at cell
but i couldnt help thinking
about how i am so distant
from god, and i cant hear him
no more.
not because he doesnt say
anything but its just that
i dont want to listen to him.
why do i get so caught up
with myself ? what i want?
what is mine ? but not what
i need and what HE wants.
as kaifeng was driving me home
there was silence, not because
we are awkward-- but we were
too darn tired and speaking
just uses too much energy.

but still i wanted to ask him
why he goes to church
and what he shared with me
touched me, got me thinking
about myself, the wrong reasons
i do go to church for.
basically, there comes a point
where we go: why do i go
to church, im going for the wrong
reasons, i might as well leave.
but its not that,
its about the committment,
the choice you've chosen,
the love you give and receive,
its about god.
so what? i can worship at home,

but kaifeng said that
its also about the fellowship
god may want me to tell
you something and he
may use you to bless me,
because when 2 or 3 are
gathered in his named,
he will indeed be in our
presence :)
are you going to church
laterss ?

for your information:
im still a sane and
happy girl, simply listening
to korean songs the whole
time doesnt mean im outta
my mind and weird
-- its just a change,
a pleasant change :)

ANY BODY WANNA PLAY TENNIS ?